On her hugely successful fifth album Be the Cowboy (2018), Mitski captures a whirlwind of emotions through solid indie rock. The polished compositions on the album suggest stability, but her honest and ambiguous lyrics chronicle a jumbled mess of emotions. In an interview with the Fader, Mitski said she “noticed a personality in me that was very obsessed with control and feeling like I have power…So I kind of investigated that person in me. What is the exaggerated form? Well, it’s a woman who’s incredibly controlled, severe, and austere.” During her Be the Cowboy Tour’s stop at the Warfield in San Francisco on November 3rd, Mitski presented the audience with the “incredibly controlled” woman. As time passed, things started to quickly change for that woman. “But maybe there’s some kind of deep desire or emotion that’s whirling around in her and trying to get out,” she continued in her interview. “Maybe she’s losing control.”

Mitski spent the first three songs almost completely still, giving the audience the controlled woman her album focuses on. Behind her a screen showed optical illusions, foreshadowing the storm that was about to take over. Then, Mitski began to aggressively pace across the stage while she sang. When the pacing stopped, Mitski turned towards the crowd with a puzzled expression across her face. Her limbs started flying in various directions. Although it would start out as if it had been choreographed, the motions would spiral out of control. Soon, Mitski lost all control of her body and her eyes flitted around the stage.

Wherever her eyes and head moved, her hands followed closely behind. It became clear that Mitski was trying to chase down her various emotions that were leaping out onto the stage and into the crowd. Even when she managed to catch her feelings by literally tackling them to the ground, Mitski freed them again and came back up fully dancing with her empty hands. Sometimes, it’s okay to lose control.

Article and Photos by Rebekah Gonzalez 

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