“The best thing you can say about me is that I have been and I always will be in the twilight zone, and I’m serious. I live a different life. I’m lonely, but it’s not just being lonely. It’s the things that I see and the way I think.” – Johnston, 1992 in an interview with The Dallas Morning News
Daniel Johnston is a legendary figure in the world of indie rock music, celebrated for his unique artistry and profound influence. Next time you’re at a concert where the crowd is packed full of indie-rock-loving men, look out for the classic “Jeremiah the Innocent” shirt, a cartoon image of a frog asking “Hi, How are you,” I can almost guarantee you’ll see a minimum of five.
As he was such a beloved figure, it was rare to encounter anyone who held a negative view of Johnston’s character– unless they had known him personally. The root of his adoration came from the childlike persona reflected in his music, with vocals and lyrics that reflect an intoxicatingly sweet demeanor. As a man who battled bipolar disorder and schizophrenia for the entirety of his life, Johnston always claimed that art was his outlet– a way to escape his own mind– whether through illustrations, creating music, or exploring new forms of art. His songs depicted stories of pain and love, something that any listener could empathize with. He was one of the strongest influences in the indie rock scene in the 90s and 2000s, and one of the most unique sounds of the American underground.
The 2005 documentary “The Devil and Daniel Johnston” details the success and tribulation of Johnston’s music career in the late 90s, as well as his struggles with mental illness. Johnston’s story begins in West Virginia, where he grew up creating music in a self constructed studio in his basement. In the early 1980s, after getting dumped by his girlfriend at the time, Johnston dropped out of college and joined a traveling circus in San Marcos. In 1984, he ended up in Austin, Texas, via the circus. He then began his career, passing out home-recorded cassette tapes in his place of employment, a McDonald’s. This earned him a niche following and established him as a well-known figure in Austin. His fan base rapidly increased after Kurt Cobain, the lead singer of Nirvana, was seen wearing the previously mentioned “Hi, How are you” shirt with the “Jeremiah the Innocent” art on it in 1992. After being promoted by one of the most famous musicians of the 90s, Johnston was able to procure a strong cult fan base and promote his music to the world.
In 1988, Johnston moved to New York City to work on his album 1990 (1990) with producer Kramer. The stress of working in a formal recording setting eventually overwhelmed him, as he was accustomed to recording alone in his basement at home. The discomfort of the situation induced what Johnston described as a “psychotic breakdown,” during which he intentionally crashed a two-seater plane carrying him and his father, both coming out miraculously unscathed. Johnston was subsequently committed to a psychiatric institution for a couple of months, leaving his album unfinished. The producer ultimately completed it using a mix of old homemade tape recordings and live sessions.
“True Love Will Find You in the End,” a song off of the album 1990, is arguably one of Johnston’s most publicly adored creations. It lasts only a minute and fifty-one seconds, with simplicity behind the crackling vocals and the loud out of tune guitar. The song is more hopeful than the musician’s typical discography, though no less heartbreaking than the rest, discussing the promise of finding “true love” and encouraging the listener to never give up in their search for it. The song encourages the listener to understand that vulnerability is the key to experiencing love, singing “only if you’re looking can it find you.” These uplifting lyrics are all the more sentimental behind Johnston’s unadulterated voice, but bring even more emotion when considering Johnston’s story. The song is a story of Johnston attempting to comfort someone, likely himself, in a time of loneliness and rejection. He urges the listener to feel better with the command, “don’t be sad” only to immediately acknowledge the futility of this request by following it with, “I know you will.” The lyric truly captures the experience of recognizing your inability to truly comfort someone–or yourself–but trying anyway, because it’s the only thing you can think to do. The lyrics reflect Johnston’s remarkable talent as a songwriter, creating a message that is both somber and inspirational, insightful yet disarmingly simple.
By the early 1990s, Johnston reemerged to the mainstream music sphere even stronger than before. His influence expanded as some of the largest bands in the alternative rock scene at the time began covering his songs, including Yo La Tengo’s cover of “Speeding Motorcycle” and Jeff Tweedy of Wilco’s rendition of “True Love Will Find You in the End.” He began collaborating with Sonic Youth, a leader of the alternative community. They became fast friends, Thurston Moore and Kim Gordon, leading members of the band, finding his eccentricity endearing.
While touring with Sonic Youth, Johnston made the mistake of spray painting the inside of the Statue of Liberty, immediately getting arrested and leaving the members of Sonic Youth confused and without an opening act for their show. They hunted him down, eventually finding him in a jail cell in New Jersey and bailing him out. Stories like these gave Johnston the title of an eccentric and misunderstood artist. He obtained the reputation of being a musical genius, misunderstood by the world around him. Johnston’s mental breakdowns caused him to receive a large amount of attention from the alternative rock fan base, providing the public with a perspective of the struggles of an artist from someone as relatable and friendly as Johnston.
Johnston brought the conversation of mental health to the foreground, highlighting the importance of destigmatizing mental illness and encouraging others to ask for help. Inspired by Daniel Johnston’s mural of Jeremiah the Innocent, a group of local Austin mental health professionals created the Hi, How Are You? Project. This nonprofit organization is meant to educate young adults on the importance of mental health and encourage others to check up on their loved ones. They put on an annual benefit concert on Johnston’s birthday in his honor, bringing together the past and present fan base in a celebration of Johnston’s legacy.
Johnston went on to touch into his passions of alternative forms of art. During the early 2010s, he began to create and publish comic books, releasing “Space Ducks – An Infinite Comic Book of Musical Greatness” along with an album and an app. In 2015, the short film-documentary “Hi How Are You Daniel Johnston?” was released by director Gabriel Sunday and executive producers Lana Del Rey and Mac Miller. The vision of the film was to “bring the audience inside the artist’s schizophrenic head,” Daniel Johnston voicing his own character during his process of creating music. In the film, Johnston talks to his past self, encouraging him to “choose the light” and make better decisions than he did. He openly discusses his use of antidepressants and their effectiveness, thus bringing awareness to asking for help, empathizing with the common struggle of “going crazy” that many musicians fear. In 2017, he ended his career with a farewell tour accompanied by other strong voices of the 90s music scene: Jeff Tweedy, Modern Baseball, and Built to Spill.
By the time of his death at age 58 on September 11, 2019, Johnston’s discography included a wide range of genres scattered across 15 albums. His legacy captures the beauty of imperfection through his crackly vocals, his whiny lyrics, and his unsophisticated demeanor. His embrace of imperfection showed a perspective of vulnerability to his fan base, something that made his work the masterpiece of heartache and unguarded emotion that it truly is.
Article by Annie Wynner